Let's be honest here people. We can have a mature, decent, dialog yes? I know I sound so bitchy. The truth is.. right now I feel so friggin' old. I think it is mostly the shippers and people using txt speak, with no punctuation or spell check. That is part of it. That and  how we are living right now, having to be the adult in all this, also does it to me.

I think all people get to a space of emotional survival. What we will take and what we won't you know? I think the last big emotional fight I was in, took so much kindness out of me. Since that one fight, I have been wandering in a state of acute shell shock. I keep waiting in my life for the other shoe to drop on me. It kind of did... in a way.

I don't want to move back to Arizona, I love California. The stuff with the landlord, and cost of living is too rough though. My mom is pushing for me to move back very hard. There are a lot of messy pluses and minuses to doing so. But- I think that it will be for the best. I wonder sometimes about what people want and what they need and how different the two are.

Yes, I am being kind of vague.

I am not sure if I want people outside of my group to know everything about what's going on with me. It is weird having someone that you don't really know, that is in a position of power over you, to covertly try to get in your pants, be creepy.  I want to hit my landlord in the mouth so bad.. it is like one of those dime store bodice rippers. Happy family lives in okay home, then evil lesbian landlord moves in (not mutual btw, while charging rent, and enslaving the people),evil l.l. then decides that the girl that cooks and cleans is cute, insert failed groping attempts... blagh blagh, as well as a few other details.. and you have how I am living.

It is worse.. but that is like it in a nutshell..

Another thing that got me.. was someone that I had been close to, but have since parted ways, posting violent/sexual stuff featuring my character. Maybe it was a shout out, because I still think about this person frequently, but part of me wonders if they will ever stop being a complete sleazy asshole for that one. Emotions are the most powerful energy on the planet. It drives our memories and how they are stored in the brain. It's hard to forget someone that made a big impression in your life. Even if you are dying to forget them. I hope I keep you up some nights.. because I too have lost sleep.

Well, that is in a nutshell how I feel. I think I will just keep my head down and sew.